HDTV Movie Premieres: March 26-April 1

Just Married: TV3, 8.30pm Saturday.

Those who aren’t Ashton Kutcher (No Strings Attached) or Brittany Murphy (Uptown Girls, King of the Hill) fans will think this laboured romantic comedy about newlyweds in Europe just awful. The Washington Post summed it up best: “A veritable orgy of strained physical gags, inane vulgarity and poor comic timing.” Date Night’s Shawn Levy directs a screenplay by Sam Harper; they also collaborated on Cheaper by the Dozen. David Rasche (Ugly Betty, Sledge Hammer) co-stars. (2003)

Tristan + Isolde: TV3, 10.35pm Saturday.

From the director of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves and The Count of Monte Cristo, Kevin Reynolds, comes this stirring, atmospheric Romeo & Juliet of the Dark Ages. The action is expertly edited and the emphasis is on the emotional and the Machiavellian rather than the mystical. James Franco, Sophia Myles (Spooks, Underworld: Evolution), Mark Strong and Rufus Sewell star. Screenwriter Dean Georgaris’ latest movie is a re-make of the French thriller, 36, for NZ-born director Martin Campbell. (2006)

Kick-Ass: Sky Movies, 8.30pm Sunday.

Rarely has a title summed up a movie’s exuberance as perfectly as Kick-Ass, a wildly kinetic superhero spoof with a dark and bloody sensibility — and more attitude than a Bat-cave full of Dark Knights. About a teenage Everyman who wants to be a superman rather than an invisible nobody, it has fun with the genre while succeeding as a grisly, turbo-charged crime drama with a cruel streak. Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake, Stardust) directs Aaron Johnson, Chloe Grace Moretz and Nicolas Cage. (2010)

Choke: TV3, 11.55pm Sunday.

In this wickedly dark comedy, a sex addict concocts a bizarre choking scam to pay for his his demented mother’s upkeep in a flash private hospital. Reviews were mixed but according to the New York Times, “It adds up to an entertaining collection of vignettes strung together by a sarcastic loudmouth whose heart is breaking under his sophomoric bravado.” Clark Gregg (Agent Coulson in the Iron Man movies) directs his first feature, which he also scripted, and co-stars with Anjelica Huston. (2008)

Daybreakers: Sky Movies, 8.30pm Monday.

After a plague turns much of mankind into vampires, the few surviving humans are farmed for their blood. But unless a plasma substitute can be found, the vampires risk degenerating into monstrous bat mutants called “subsiders” that aren’t so much anaemic as cannibalistic. It’s refreshing to see such an ambitious take on a done-to-death genre but frustratingly the filmmakers run out of juice quicker than their protagonists. Ethan Hawke, Willem Dafoe and Sam Neill star. (2009)

Crazy Heart: Sky Movies, 8.30pm Wednesday.

Jeff Bridges won his first Oscar in this slight but telling drama about a booze-battered country music icon who’s reduced to one-night stands in bowling alleys and opening for a rival (Colin Farrell) he once mentored … until he meets a solo mum-cum-aspiring journalist (Maggie Gyllenhaal) who reignites his passion and creativity. What ensues is a familiar but affecting to-the-brink-and-back tale of regret and redemption that’s elevated by fine performances, superb cinematography and achy-breaky heartfelt songs. (2009)

The Dukes of Hazzard: Sky Movies Greats, 8.30pm Friday.

Those good ol’ boy racers are back to rev up a new generation with their hillbilly hi-jinks. Sean William Scott and Johnny Knoxville play the iconic hellraisers of the ‘80s TV series in a Hollywood re-make that confirms the franchise has really gone to the Hoggs. Jessica Simpson co-stars as their leggy cousin Daisy Duke while Burt Reynolds recaptures his own White Lightning days as their arch rival, Boss Hogg. (2005)

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